Seccers 8 Smokin Guns 4
After coming through a very bad period that felt like a combination of wind, bloating, belching, passage pain, indigestion and pure poo… and generally feeling like team's intestines were hanging on the outside - Seccers finally got back on the winners list which saw them return to the Top 4 of the competition.
Although the above description was the experience of returning resident man of mystery Daniel Craig, 009 himself, Sir William, who was heard releasing a huge burp after a long passage of play, so to speak - it pretty much summed up the team's performance running into the last game for the year.
But a magnificent call to arms, following Rupes' tale of desperation from last week, saw real commitment from the players who were prepared to risk an achilles tendon, their Bangkok belly and the birth of their new kid. Although the same can't be said for some bloke laid up in bed with a spongy lung after a frolic in potting mix, or the 'ultra committed' CEO who couldn't leave his treadmill in his attempt to look like Bono for Xmas. But one of the players appeared very keen to show up and show off his new missus, as was discussed in the post game gossip over a coldie, as they conveniently walked away with a trail of smitten in the air.
So to the game. The scoreboard indicated a whooping, but the game appeared closer as the Smokin Guns scored a few soft tries, with one sneaky effort when their substitute winger came out of nowhere and caught Burkie & Soulmann napping when they thought they had the numbers. Burkie admitted after the game he was actually thinking about an intercept to try and match the huge 80m effort by the big man Tunksie who stomped his way down the sideline leaving players in his wake.
That run pretty much kept Tunksie quiet for a while until he was on the end of another freakish try mid way through the second half. It happened after dummyhalf Soulmann, poorly telegraphing he was going to throw a long ball and sneak down the blind side, had to recalculate his plan. As the link defender failed to fall for this obvious trickery, Soulmann had to step off his left back into open space, only for a flying Burkie to shoot past him into the vacant hole. As Soulmann cursed this missed opportunity, yet another juggernaut of runners flew through the same hole without the ball. In the confusion to both attack and defence, the big man came loping and late into the vortex created by the others and he received the pass like a guided missile (some say intentional, others say it was a badly timed pass that the huge man latched onto) and he scored what ended up as the 'try of the year'.
JJ Buck was also in the thick of things, scoring 2 meaties and his audacious reverse flick pass to the winger, after a great set of hands to from his inside men, was something to be believed. It seems as though he had all the time in the world, but again critics were amazed that the retard hovering over him simply could have touched him 14 times in the time it took JJ buck to catch, turn, reposition, shuffle shuffle and flick the ball. Critics also panned JJ Buck after the game when he had a 20m start to the line with no one in front and was embarrassingly denied a hat trick when Toppy caught him 10m out... ok ok, you say, Toppy used to be the fastest winger back in 1987.
So the boys have earned a well earned rest for xmas and will gladly take the free 3 points on offer for the bye next week.
Soulmann acknowledges the literary contributions of Rupes, JJ Buck, Will the man of Dysentery, and U2 Stuey.
